Obey

Sometimes what God says doesn’t make sense, or is something I don’t want to do. I have difficulty, because I don’t want to do it. I want to be rich and powerful. I want to be able to rely on myself for life, for my sustenance. Yet, I know I am supposed to trust in God, to rely on God for my daily needs. No matter how much I read how I am supposed to rely on God, I still don’t want to. My heart is not there. Yet, I still feel I need to obey. Even though it is something I don’t really want to do, I still need to just obey. Maybe my heart will be changed over time. Maybe it won’t. Either case, I still need to just obey, no matter what my feelings are. No matter how much I may long to have a million dollars in the bank, I need to rely on God, to turn to God, to follow God. I don’t know where this will lead, I may not even like where it will lead, but I must follow anyways. “Obey God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of men.” I read this tonight, and couldn’t help but be moved by the absence of any kind of indication that I will like it, or will understand it. It just says “obey, for that is why you are here.” How can I argue with logic like that?